Wednesday, August 13, 2014

How To Keep Yourself From Getting Scared While Home Alone


You may have experienced the feeling... It's late. The sun set hours ago. You're in the living room on your laptop, or maybe in the corner of the dining room on your desktop. You're reading Alone at Night when suddenly you feel small and fragile. In every unseen room lurks something sinister. Something malicious. You want to look out your windows to see what that noise was, but are too afraid what you'll find. Did you lock the backdoor after taking the trash out? Maybe not.

Okay, so we've all been there at some time in our lives. Maybe we grew out of it, and maybe we didn't. Maybe some of us even enjoy it. That feeling of feathers sliding up your neck, of some mammalian instinct to tighten stomach muscles and breath quicker.


Can you overcome the willies? This wikihow page is all about steps one can take to keep from getting frightened while being home alone. Let's examine them one by one.

1 Scan Your Home. Take a walk-through of your house the second everyone is gone, before you really have time to let the fear set in. This includes looking behind couches, peeking at the spot between the door and the wall, and checking every room. You may feel silly, but it will save you from becoming paranoid later. Turn all lights on.

First, don't turn on all your lights. It wastes energy and money and only gives the people outside (waiting to get in) a better view of you in your pajamas. Secondly, as you move from room to room, so may the creepers, staying one room ahead of you (muahahaha).

2 Lock All Doors and Windows. Next, go through every room again and ensure that every door and window is safely locked. The second check of every room adds to the feeling of safety and locking the doors and windows is a must.  
 
Pointless. They're already inside your house, under your bed and in the basement.
 
3 Identify Sounds. Ever get scared out of your wits by what you were sure was an intruder, but just turned out to be a dripping facet? Identify all of the sounds that might scare you so that you know what to expect.

That's not a dripping faucet. That's blood.

4 Check Blinds and Doors. During the day, keep your blinds open. Due to the fact that more light is outside than inside, you can look out but it is difficult for others to peer in. The opposite is true during the night, so if you're alone when it's dark close all blinds. If you can see most of the interior of a room with the door open, leave it open. If you can only see part of the room when you look through the door (such as a staircase that curves around or a bathroom with a separate room for the toilet), close it. You'll then be less nervous about someone sneaking up from somewhere that you can't see.
 
But did you remember that one curtain upstairs. That one near the window with the broken latch. The one that moves slowly in the wind. Wait, there is no wind...

5 Turn up the sound. If your house makes scary sounds, turn on the television and some music. When you can't hear the creaks and other unidentifiable sounds, you won't be as nervous.

Brilliant. Can't be afraid of someone if you don't know they're coming.

6 Take your mind off it. If you're still nervous, find something to do. Finish that Spanish presentation. Build a fort of pillows for your pet. Clean the house! Keep your hands and mind busy

Our recommendation is to sharpen your knives, at least take a few practice swings with your baseball bat. A pulled muscle is nothing to laugh at.

7 Call a friend. You're probably only nervous when you're completely alone, so ask a friend to come over. You'll feel much safer with another person around, and you'll have more fun
 
Your guy friend? Yeah, remember that time you ditched out on him to hang out with that dreamy guy with the muscles? You do? So does he.
Your girl friend? Remember that time in 8th grade you told her she was a slut? Yeah, so does she.
 
8 Breathe. Remember that the probability of someone sneaking into your home or something bad happening to you while you're alone is extremely low. Take a deep breath and don't worry about it. Odds are, you'll be fine!
 
The odds! In my small Midwestern town of 50,000 there is a 6.2 in 100,000 chance of being murdered. Which means I'm more likely to be die by murder than: lightning, weather related death, being bit by dog, earthquake, tornado, flood. Oh, and I have much better odds of being murdered than winning the lottery.
 
Sleep tight.
 

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